How can I be free when they are not?
How can I be free when they are not?
Lieutenant Tara McGuigan was part of the first Salvation Army team to arrive on Nauru on 10 September, to provide humanitarian support for asylum seekers being housed there. Now back in Australia, Tara reflects on her service on the remote Pacific island nation.
“How was Nauru?” When one of my closest friends asked me this question only hours after I had returned to Australia, I was stuck for words. I felt it was like being asked: “What’s the meaning of life?” How could I even start to express what for me was an experience so huge, so overwhelming? Right there, on the phone, I couldn’t lucidly put into words any one thing about what Nauru was like for me.
Now into my third day back, however, I am able to lay some clarity around the question, “How was Nauru?” This 21sq km island is four-and-a-half hours by air from Brisbane. The asylum seekers, who arrive by boat in Australian waters, are transferred there while their claims for asylum are being processed. This can take a long time, often years.
They are placed in camps where they sleep under canvas. Nauru is within five degrees of the Equator. The island is extremely hot and humid. Living conditions are far from ideal. The actual camp area is no more than two acres. There is no air-conditioning, and a few fans ineffectively disturb the heavy humidity.
How could I say the experience was “great” when it was so tragic for so many who kept regularly arriving by plane from Christmas Island or Darwin? How could I say that it was fulfilling when all the time I was surrounded by desperation and hopelessness? How could I say that I was able to bring these residents some hope and friendship when they had left behind everyone they loved and everything they owned or shared or enjoyed?
How could I say that I was able to support young Raj (all names used are pseudonyms) when he had witnessed his mother being gunned down before his eyes at the age of nine? How could I say I brought a smile to Ravi’s face when he arrived with a smile that never left his beautiful face despite the horrors life had flung his way? How could I feel I had offered a hand of welcome to an angry Hameed when, on his arrival, he yelled, “We are not animals,” as he looked around him and felt rejection and desolation?
How could I say I made a difference when nothing had really changed for my brothers? In fact, despite good food and the promise of better living conditions, on Nauru their quest for freedom in Australia had just taken a turn for the worse. More than that, it had come to an abrupt halt.
They had fled war, death, torture, and suffering, and then the risk of drowning at sea, in search of freedom from fear, safety and a new life. They had scrounged around and scraped up every dollar and cent they could find to pay their way, preyed upon by heartless people-smugglers who wanted nothing else but their money and cared less for these desperate human beings than they would if they squashed an irritating fly.
I feel helpless. I feel like a grain of sand on a beach of pebbles. I feel like I am a whisper amid a cacophony of sound. I feel like a faintly glowing star trying to light up a dark universe.
I feel humble. I feel ashamed. I feel like I am nothing, insignificant and puny. No, I don’t feel blessed, I don’t feel free, I can’t sing “Give thanks” when my fellow human beings live in circumstances that call for nothing less that abject pity and sorrow.
How can I be free when they are not? How can I be thankful for my own little comfortable life when so many people have no place to call home? How can I say I am blessed when all their worldly possessions are carried around in a single plastic bag, zipped up at the top so their meagre belongings don’t fall out?
In my spirit and my thoughts I go back to Topside, the name of the asylum seeker village on Nauru. I see myself walking in my comfortable Reeboks thanking God they are strong enough to withstand the layers of pebbles and stones that cover most of the ground. My friend Omar makes a parting request of me, to please ask for a pair of shoes for him because all he has are his rubber thongs and it’s hard for him to play in the cricket and volleyball games the Salvos organise.
There is a solitary tree in the compound under which many of my brothers gather. It is the coolest spot. As I fly back into Australia, I notice rivers and lush green countryside covered with forest in many places. I experience a newfound consciousness for a country of natural abundance. As I sit on my lounge in my comfortable house, I look out over the garden surrounded by beautiful and plentiful trees and plants and bushes. None of that at Topside with its single tree crowded with chairs and camp beds on which displaced people sit and lie as they try to find shade and catch a whiff of breeze.
Albert Einstein said: “Time is not at all what it seems. It does not flow in only one direction, and the future exists simultaneously with the past.”
My life and the lives of these asylum seekers are inextricably bound. I am the boy Dilan, 18, fleeing to Australia in a boat, spending 28 days at sea, the last five with no food or fresh water, surviving on sea water laced with vinegar and sugar. I am the devoted husband and loving father of Fathima and Nissa and Saji left behind in war-torn Iraq, promising to find a way to bring the most important people in my life to a place of freedom and safety. I am Shamir who changed from Christianity to Islam because I was persecuted and punished for my faith. I am that son, that daughter, that friend, that relative who lives in nowhere land.
What answer can I give to people who, as we say goodbye after three weeks of intense life journeying, turn their eyes to me and ask: “What will happen to us? Do you think we’ll ever get to Australia?”
How do I speak words of hope to people who have called me “Akka” (Sri Lankan for big sister), “Sister”, “Aunty” and “Tara Miss”, acutely aware they may never see their hope fulfilled? I leave feeling like a deserter, acutely aware of these people’s need for love and respect, hope and kindness. My heart is scattered among them all. We are one.
For reflection: “Lord, set the captives free.” Read Isaiah 58:6-10.
Lieutenant Tara McGuigan is Corps Officer of The Salvation Army’s Capricorn Region Corps.
UPDATE***
Thank you to everyone for your questions and concerns regarding recent events in Nauru. The Salvation Army has given the following response.
There is no doubt that one of the most challenging and heated issues facing Australia in recent years has been the ongoing response to asylum seekers traveling by boat to our shores. The Salvation Army recognizes that this issue has generated many different views and solutions, and that Australians hold a wide range of views about what should or shouldn't be done. We respect and understand the strong, differing viewpoints that have been expressed in these posts.
However, The Salvation Army's calling is not just to engage in debate and discussion, but to stand with, and work alongside people who are suffering and vulnerable.
The Salvation Army is not in a position to change government policy at this point in time, but we are committed to doing everything we can in the Asylum Processing Centers at Nauru and Manus Island to try and make a difficult situation a little more tolerable for them.
Our presence in the Regional Processing Centers does not mean we support the policy of offshore processing, just as our presence serving tea and coffee and providing encouragement to our frontline troops in WW1 and WW2 did not mean we support war or violence. But we always have and will, be on the frontline, in places where there is suffering or need.
It is not in the heart of The Salvation Army to walk away from people when they are at their most desperate and alone. For The Salvation Army to withdraw from Nauru would leave these people's care only in the hands of the security team. One of them said to me as I was leaving Nauru recently, " Please don't take The Salvation Army from this place. You are our only hope."
I will not let this man, and his friends down, by deserting them for a short lived political statement. If caring for these people impacts our brand, then we will pay that cost. There are almost 400 men on Nauru and you can be assured that for the vast majority of them our presence is making a difference.
Its perfectly reasonable to object to a government policy, but still be fully engaged in providing humanitarian assistance to those affected by the policy. This is the situation we're in and we will stay the course as long as our support is needed.
We ask all Australians of faith to pray for our personnel who undertake this important work and for all those who will come into our care. We ask all Australians to think compassionately and generously towards those displaced in the world, who are searching for a new home and a safe haven.
Thank you for all your contributions.
Paul Moulds AM (Major)
Comments
Thank you
Tara,
Thank you for putting into words what I too have been feeling since coming home and leaving behind our beautiful new friends.
WOW Tara. Thank you
tears in my eyes.
Thank you for this insight into the conditions and life of these needy people. We are with you all in thought and prayer daily. We ministered in the Christmas Island Detention Centres for seven and a half months and love these people and our hearts go out to them. We can identify with all you have written and will keep praying for freedom for them. They don't deserve this. Noone deserves this.
Thank you.
Heart Rending - I think your report needs to be sent to our Prime Minister.
How do we get Omar shoes Tara? There must be a way. Thanks for sharing - this was such a sad thing to read but so so necessary. Thank you.
I, too, share your sentiments. The trip actually changed my outlook of life.
Thank God for the Sallies... said with feeling.
You speak the truth Tara and capture the hopelessness and despair of people who left home and family for compelling reasons. I am so thankful that you and your colleagues in the Salvation Army throughout Australia and the Pacific will speak out and tell the Australian electorate in particular, that treating asylum seekers like criminals is wrong, that taking away a person's liberty is wrong, that keeping innocent men, women and children in immigration detention INDEFINITELY is wrong in every way you can think of. DEtention is punishment and not necessary.
Thank you for the glimmer of hope the small comfort you are able to give the asylum seekers on Nauru.
Thankyou Tara for your reflection. Now get started on sending runners and shoes so these people can play soccer and sport. In detention this is one of the only escapes for detainees.
You went for a reason. Continue your contact with them in a physical gesture. They will know you are thinking of them if you send them shoes to play in. Well done. So glad we have people like you on the planet. Lou Dingle Refugee therapist/advocate
Thank you Tara- you have painted a vivid picture of how life is for these people who have fled such desparate circumstances risking their lives just for the want of living a life that we just take for granted - why are we so blessed and so many are in so much despair. Can we as a nation be more willing to show acceptance,love and compassion to those who have suffered so much already.
Tara, thanks for sharing the story of your time in Nauru with such sensitivity and love. Please tell us what we can do from here.
PS. I'm involved with Amnesty International and we are lobbying the government through letter-writing. We're also sending dictionaries (The Salvation Army is partnering with them on this).
Thank you for this Tara. Please be aware that your exposure to this is a potential pre-cursor for PTSD. Please ensure yourself and your organisation are prepared for this and they are preparing others. Unfortunately there is little that can be done to assist the residents of Topside.
You've perfectly described how I have been feeling. Such an emotive piece of writing, thank you Tara!
An amazing description about life on Nauru for both Assylum Seekers and those trying to help and the impact of your return to life back in Australia. Thanks for putting words to your hearts response.
An amazing description about life on Nauru for both Assylum Seekers and those trying to help and the impact of your return to life back in Australia. Thanks for putting words to your hearts response.
What an amazing description of the life experience of both Assylum seekers and those working to help, and sharing the impact of your experience of your return to Australia. Thanks for putting into words your hearts response.
I can't understand why the Salvation Army decided to accept a contract to work for the Australian government in Nauru.
You're part of making this system happen. It morally compromises you in the eyes of the people you're seeking to help (as can be seen in the protests over the weekend), and it allows your motives and actions to be questioned. Today the department is spinning the Salvation Army's clarification of events to emphasise that there is air conditioning and fans available... (even though they're clearly inadequate according to accounts like this).
Can you really stand up for justice and salvation while you're tied to the pursestrings of an unjust system?
heart-rending, the only thing we can do in life is to keep pressuring and keep organising so one day this inhumane disgraceful system will end; and while these asyum-seekers suffer their tormentors are making deals and making money with each other... thanks for telling the facts and for speaking out
There are no smugglers preying on anyone, there are no smugglers at all as it is a legal right to come here and seek protection and quite legal to pay for it.
What is illegal is to treat human beings in this way.
What sort of racist nation have we become, the salvos. must stop doing this dirty work for a racist government.
Im in Nauru at the moment I know what u went through
Im in Nauru at the moment what an experience
Thank you Tara. Punishing the victims of war is destroying us not just them. We need to change this WRONG policy. We need to unite to help our fellow humans by overturning this evil policy. We know it is not illegal to seek asylum. Why are they being punished?
welcome to my world
It is great to hear your story. There has been some disturbing news recently about the Salvation Army pulling down banners of the refugees. This does not seem to match the comments you have made in this letter. I would love to hear your response to these accusations. It is also good to see that the Salvation Army is still willing to speak out against an appalling situation despite their involvement in the system.
A small point - I think that your portrayal of the "people smugglers" is a bit harsh. As with all trade, there are people that take advantage of a situation to profit, regardless of the consequences. However, many of the people involved in people smuggling are poor fishermen get paid a small amount and some people even do it as they have a desire to help refugees reach a country in which they can seek asylum. Not all are bad.
Thank you for giving us that heartbreaking glimpse of what it is really like in Nauru. I wonder how we can help in small ways?
Thanks for demonstrating that some Christians still value Matthew 25. I don't understand how some of our politicians who parade their "Christianity" have no concept of caring for others.
Was a grt experience to work alongside you Tara & with many in the team of compassionate hearts...Im speechless...except to continue in vigilant prayer for our dear friends who loved & called me 'SISTER'
Was a grt experience to work alongside you Tara & with many in the team of compassionate hearts...Im speechless...except to continue in vigilant prayer for our dear friends who loved & called me 'SISTER'
The salvos are supporting a terrible crime.
Tara, I am shaken by your article. But more than that, I am ashamed.
Thank you to everyone for your questions and concerns. Below is a statement by Major Paul Moulds which addresses most of the questions which are being raised:
There is no doubt that one of the most challenging and heated issues facing Australia in recent years has been the ongoing response to asylum seekers traveling by boat to our shores. The Salvation Army recognizes that this issue has generated many different views and solutions, and that Australians hold a wide range of views about what should or shouldn't be done. We respect and understand the strong, differing viewpoints that have been expressed in these posts.
However, The Salvation Army's calling is not just to engage in debate and discussion, but to stand with, and work alongside people who are suffering and vulnerable.
The Salvation Army is not in a position to change government policy at this point in time, but we are committed to doing everything we can in the Asylum Processing Centers at Nauru and Manus Island to try and make a difficult situation a little more tolerable for them.
Our presence in the Regional Processing Centers does not mean we support the policy of offshore processing, just as our presence serving tea and coffee and providing encouragement to our frontline troops in WW1 and WW2 did not mean we support war or violence. But we always have and will, be on the frontline, in places where there is suffering or need.
It is not in the heart of The Salvation Army to walk away from people when they are at their most desperate and alone. For The Salvation Army to withdraw from Nauru would leave these people's care only in the hands of the security team. One of them said to me as I was leaving Nauru recently, " Please don't take The Salvation Army from this place. You are our only hope."
I will not let this man, and his friends down, by deserting them for a short lived political statement. If caring for these people impacts our brand, then we will pay that cost. There are almost 400 men on Nauru and you can be assured that for the vast majority of them our presence is making a difference.
Its perfectly reasonable to object to a government policy, but still be fully engaged in providing humanitarian assistance to those affected by the policy. This is the situation we're in and we will stay the course as long as our support is needed.
We ask all Australians of faith to pray for our personnel who undertake this important work and for all those who will come into our care. We ask all Australians to think compassionately and generously towards those displaced in the world, who are searching for a new home and a safe haven.
Thank you for all your contributions.
Paul Moulds AM (Major)
Thanks for posting the comment by Major Paul Moulds. His statement reflects the spirit of The Salvation Army. We continue to make our views known to the government regarding its asylum seeker policy, while coming alongside those who need us most - that is, the asylum seekers. Any other approach would simply punish the asylum seekers.
Gawd, the hysteria. These people were not forced to come here, but now that they have they need to abide by the law and allow Australia to protect it's borders as it sees fit for the protection of the majority of (which much to everyone's apparent disgust) Australians.
Agi, Your ignorance would be breathtaking if not so tragic. Are you still unaware that it is Australia that is breaking the law regarding asylum seekers, and that refugees are exercising their legal rights in seeking protection. Wake up and discover the real facts, don't try and mask racism with ignorance.
A heart-wrenching account of your experience, Tara! I'm so glad there are Salvationists like you who are willing and able to go and make things a bit more tolerable for these people who are enduring such inhumane conditions, of which our govt should be ashamed. I can't help but reflect on the comment of the refugee who said that they are not animals. No they are not! Our expectations in Australia for the treatment of animals are much higher! They would not be cast away into a 'hell-hole' so close to the equator - and when harsh treatment of animals is made public there is such outrage that action is taken. I am ashamed that our 'lucky country' treats those who have already suffered so much so badly. God bless all who, like you, are taking what personal action they can.
Can any one organization solve all the ills of the world? At least the Sallies are there with a cuppa and an open heart and hand. As the saying goes...Thank God for the salvos.
God bless your heart, Genuine refugees will need its strength. However, You are the boy Dilan, 18 (or other) fleeing to Australia in a boat, spending 28 days at sea. How true is this story? How long will it take to authenticate it? I ask because one refugee (during Howard Pacific Solution) who got resettled in Australia confessed to a befriended local here on Nauru that he fabricated his life's story to IOM UNHCR and advocates, because his real history would render him ineligible for resettlement. Just a concern that your genuine heart could be taken advantage of by ravening wolves in sheeps clothing. So to me Nauru and it's like are only temporary holdings for refugees until their history is authenticated and Australia will know for sure who the real person is.
@FreeGuy:
Both worker and volunteer and victim are in danger of PTSD and stress related conditions. That is precisely the lesson of mandatory detention since 1992.Professional debriefing for employees is essential and only those prepared for the difficult task should be assigned to work with asylum seekers. Maybe the Salvos can create training and support involving Australians who were refugees.You can learn only so much ABOUT asylum seekers and their circumstances, and it is essential to connect with survivors of this experience, to learn from them. The Hazara, Tamil and Iranian and Kurd ish communities in Australia have people who would gladly help the Salvos to help the asylum seekers in detention.
The Salvation Army has wonderful compassion. I am with another christian organisation and have spent two years going into the Darwin centres where, especially during 2011, I saw awful suffering. One almost believed it was a deliberate policy to be cruel, like when a man on the roof in the hot September sun, and who had a physciatric condition, was refused water (I solved that one!). The problem for the Salvation army is one of perception. The asylum seeker debate is a very divisive debate, sometimes not even a debate but invective,and the Salvos are seen by some as compromising their ability to advocate for the poor and the sufferning by suppping with the devil with too short a spoon. When you are in the pay of the government, you are controlled and your core business can be compromised. Advocacy may not be a core Salvo business, but how can you help without bringing to the attention of the workd at large situations that are unacceptabe and unnecessary. I too felt for the article, as it is something I too have experienced.
The way she expressed the story is amazing...i live in manus island,papua new guine and living in here is the worst one...aleee
The article makes me wanting to donate money to you---The great Salvation Army. Really appreciate what you all have done for humans.